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"Give us language to express

the timing of the endlessness.

Give us language to impress

our forms upon the emptiness.

As interns of eternity

in turn

we shall eternal be"

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The Michaelangelo that can be googled is not The Ungoogleable Michaelangelo.


The Ungoogleable is The Unspeakable, The Unquantifyable, The Uncharted. 

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Originating in The Netherlands,

The Ungoogleable Michaelangelo is a creator of cosmic, comedic, and contemplative content.

He is a multi-dimensional artist with a psychoactive personality. Equipped with a quickSilver tongue and mercurial mind, he utilizes pareidolia, wit, wordplay, and a 6th sense of humor to mindfully investigate where the limits of language meet the fringes of reality.


His work finds expression through visual art, written and spoken word, music, film, performance, and Oracular Interactions.

He is the host and creator of the podcast Self Portraits As Other People, and the author of The He & The She of It and Impatient Transformations.

He is none of the things he says he is, and more.


For one special night at Mandala Springs, a "verdant paradise that stands asa convergence between worlds," located just outsode of Asheville, NC, where Michaelangelo will regale you with his multivalent bardistry in an attempt to instill wonder. He’ll tell about how he followed the call to journey to a snail-shaped time machine in the Mexican jungle, how pareidolia can be used as a means to pop open portals that lead towards the invention of a new dimension, and how precognition and synchronicity can be invoked and practically applied.


Show up early for a live “daemonstration” of how a Divined Design comes into being, in a participatory Rorschach Worship Workshop that will teach you how to make your own divinatory artworks. Don’t know how or what to draw! Lucky you, because we will forego knowing and venture on a journey of discovery! You’ll be surprised by what you will create!

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*digital replay*

Learn to make your own Divined Designs and Pareidoodles!


Most non-artists freeze up before a blank canvas, not knowing what to draw. Using my techniques we forego knowing, and enter into a creative process of discovering.


No experience necessary! You don’t need to know what to draw or how to draw. We will literally make the mind visible and outline our findings.




For the price of a regular coffee, you can become a "Patreot" to The Ungoogleable imagiNation, which grants you access to exclusive behind-the-seen transmissions that can be found nowhere else. You can activate a 7-day free trial by entering through the "threshold dose" tier.

All of this was made possible by

The Aleatoric Organization

in association with

The Divined Design

I also raise the dead for a living. 


I offer the service of writing, recording, and performing voice-overs that bare uncanny resemblance to the voices of dearly departed psychedelic celebrities such as Terence Mckenna, Tim Leary, Hunter S. Thompson, William S. Burroughs and others (some alive, e.g. Werner Herzog, Zizek, Peterson, etc).


Contact me for inquiries.

Praise for The Ungoogleable

"One of the most creative and talented minds out there right now." -Colin Frangicetto, artist & guitarist of Circa Survive

"[Michaelangelo is] a multi-talented, psychedelicized, and exceptionally witty [...] wordsmith with a great gift for impressions, puns, neologisms, and accents." -Erik Davis, author of Techgnosis

"Michaelangelo is a combination of Robin Williams, Michael Winslow, and Terence Mckenna all in one. A fascinating character." -Ramin Nazer, artist & host of The Rainbow Brainskull Podcast

" exceptional mind. [...] It was said that Stanley Kubrick, whenever he said anything, spoke on four different levels at once. The literal, the metaphorical, the allegorical, and the spiritual. Michaelangelo has a similar multi-dimensional lexicon." -Charles Shaw, filmmaker, author of Exile Nation

"Slick mercurial vanguard... whose creativity is too extensive for a single set of senses" -Michael Garfield, artist & host of Future Fossils Podcast

"A modern master of the gnomic aphorism." -JF Martel, author of Reclaiming Art in the Age of Artifice, host of Weird Studies

"Dazzlingly prodigious... [Michaelangelo's] multiple talents resemble siddhis..." -Jasun Horsley, author of Prisoner of Infinity


Find yourself stuck in your creative process?

Lost for words?

I am confident I can help you unblock your creative flow

with the ease of a genie granting a wish...

Need a pithy slogan that encapsulates your brand

or distills the complex themes it embodies into an essence?

Seeking someone to direct your music video?

Need original artwork for your wall

or the cover of your book, album, or business? 


for creative consultations,

brain-storming sessions,

commissions, or general curiosities.

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“Michaelangelo has one of the most dynamic arsenals I’ve encountered in all my artistic undertakings. He has a mastery of language and great philosophical depth, coupled with a sincere and unencumbered collaborative spirit. He knows how to nurture and expand a creative idea, and how to strategize about actualizing and presenting it. He’s been instrumental for me both with tangibles like brand development and website design, and in the conceptual territory of defining my space as an artist and activist. I highly recommend him for consultation, ideation and collaboration.” -Nathan Dufour Oglesby, PhD, writer / rapper / educator @ Nathanology